Lightening?

I have read about "lightening" at the end of pregnancy. I'm not sure if that's what has happened this weekend, but the babies have definitely made a change. I can't say they feel lighter though, if that's what that term is supposed to mean! They seem much lower and all of a sudden I feel lots of movement on my left side, when the last few months I have mostly been feeling movement on my right side. Along with the dropping, I have started getting some serious lower back pain. I was driving to Lowe's to pick up some supplies for my hubby yesterday (who has been working his tail off to get our new house ready) and I was seriously beginning to wonder if I was going into labor between the back pain and the cramps I was feeling. Thankfully, the cramping stopped, but it has kind come and gone the last day or so. The other thing I've been noticing is that my Braxton Hicks contractions are actually waking me up in the night. They still aren't painful, but I find myself waking up feeling uncomfortable and find my stomach is hard as a rock. And the boob leakage at night seems to be getting worse!

I was joking with my husband that it's amazing how pain is relative. I used to notice the pain in my feet and ankles. Now, I mostly pay attention to the pain in my knees/legs (where the fluid is the worst) and the upper right abdominal pain (thinking my liver). I ask myself, "do my feet not hurt anymore?" or "is my hand not numb from carpal tunnel?" and I find that those things ARE still there....I just happen to notice the things that hurt the worst! Honestly, I am in pretty bad shape. There are very few things that don't hurt at this point.

With these latest symptoms, I basically feel like a ticking time bomb. Part of me wants the babies to stay put and grow and get strong. We need another week or so to get the new house ready. Plus, I'm not sure if I've mentioned this, but I have secretly been hoping these babies are born on July 31st. My mother-in-law passed away from cancer at the young age of 55. Hubby and I miss her dearly and are so incredibly sad that our boys will never know her. Anyway, her birthday was July 31st....what an amazing thing that would be. On the flip side, part of me (my poor body) is so ready to deliver these babies and rid myself of all the fluid and weight and pain. Speaking of weight, I think I have gained about 55 lbs now. 55 lbs you guys!!!!!!!! I weighed less than 110 lbs at the beginning of this!!! I digress. Obviously these babies will come when they are ready (or if I make it past 38 weeks).

The anticipation is getting exciting! I have started wondering what these little guys will look like, what their personalities will be. I worry about breastfeeding and sleep deprivation and being a good mom and not a complete stress case. My heart swells watching my hubby practice taking the stroller for spins around the garage. But mostly, I just pray that my boys are healthy. I can still hardly believe that this is happening. I am two weeks or less from having a family, which is something I wasn't sure I would ever have.